3 Ring Binder

The barking has stopped, but there is no relief. The last of the tumbleweeds have been swept.   The gentle tapping of the too-long nails, The happy thumping of excitable tails,   The last of wet kisses - now memories wept.   The barking has stopped, but there is no relief.   For Hapi, Buddy, and Chloe

I got this little app called My Talking Pet and I can't stop playing with it.  My daughters have told me in no uncertain terms to stop texting them movies of their beloved pets talking. That such a practice is disrespectful and gross.   I cordially disagree.  This here is comedy gold.*  *Especially if your family often quotes the Beatles-like vultures in the original Jungle Book movie. 

This is my dog. This is my happy dog. This is my happy dog hightailing away from me. This is my happy dog hightailing away from me after I had him in a headlock. This is my happy dog hightailing away from me after I had him in a headlock to take a picture with me. This is my dog after having to take a picture with me.  Happy. And now you know why. 

He stands poised, ears erect, at the edge of wide cart path, staring into the woods. A chipmunk, a squirrel, a robin, even, catching his momentary interest. But it is only momentary. Less than a minute, really. Waiting for a signal. Waiting for a louder call into the woods -- the tipping point to the chase. It doesn't come. Instead he hears, let's go dog!  and his wild revelry is broken. Thirty feet later, he does it again.

With less than 24 hours to go, all the mushers are in! Well, all the mushers that my family members chose to follow in this year's Iditarod, that is. The scientific mind clearly runs in the family as my son chose  Nicolas Petit  as his musher for the following reasons in descending order of relevance: Sponsored by Mr. Prime Beef. 2011 Rookie of the Year as last minute medical replacement (beat that, Stephen's hottie). Appearance (sweet hat\shades combo, prominent Adam's apple (Stephen's hottie's "Eve apples" will not come into play due to winter coat)). Sponsored by Ray Redington Sr., son of Iditarod co-founder Joe Redington Sr. Ray Sr sponsored my selection over his own gd son, Ray Jr., bib# 2. Drama! Sponsored by Spiff, Wiggy's, and a funeral home.  My oldest daughter chose Dallas Seavey who, at 24, has a proven track record of success and a real potential to win the darn thing! She reports that he's a third generation mushe...

In what I thought would be a bit of family dog fun, I asked everyone to pick a musher to follow for the Iditarod dog sled race which begins in two days. Let's just say, the response had been less than enthusiastic. After an additional prompting email, this is what I have received so far:  Because I have little else to go on here for choosing a musher, I'm going to have to revert to the standard, typical, and admittedly shallow, male evaluation criteria: When in doubt, pick the hottest babe. (I believe that rule-of-thumb is comparable to the female, "You might as well marry a rich man.") Having thus degraded myself, I will now throw my enthusiastic support behind Zoya DeNure .   Go Zoya! Go Eukanuba! And here is Zoya : She obviously meets his criteria here, but I love her 80s look,  and her Flock of Seagulls meets Martha Davis tribute.  For the record, here is  my chosen musher , who happens to be very cute and there are two of them ! (Strangely, m...

It is with a heavy heart that I write this post this afternoon. The WKC has just jumped the shark in placing an alien footstool (thank you Eric Asimov ) on the same pedestal with such dog greats as Uno , Carlee , James , not to mention Rufus ! This little dirty-cotton-candy-dragger-gone-bad dustmop  shouldn’t even be in the same species as the regal Rufus .  If I were a cussin’ gal (and I am) I might scream out WTF WKC !?!  But as this is a family blog (sort of), I’ll constrain my colorful language to initials. Still, I try to remember that like the Poodle , the Peke-devil may be in the do .  (Of course that doesn't explain its motion like that of an inanimate object under the influence of dark magic.) At least you could see its eyes. Malachy or Malarkey? Now that that unpleasantness is out of the way, let me get to some of the good parts of the show.  In the Sporting Group, where there are lots of nice, real dogs, I would have chosen the black and white Po...

The Hound Group went first and it was a little disappointing. For the second, or third year in a row, I liked Chanel, the Whippet (who took third), and the PBGV (who took second), and much to my surprise, I really liked the longhaired dachshund !   She was very alert and peppy and walked so beautifully which are some things that I never say about the stunted little dogs!   I was most impressed with the Plott , a relative newcomer on my radar with a – dare I say – f’ugly breed name, unless you name her Plan and so can introduce her as “my Plott, Plan.” (A little civil engineering humor for you there.) Everyone in the house agreed that the Rhodesian Ridgeback was a stunning dog. (Hey – I used to know a civil engineer who owned a Rhodie!) Alas, my picks were not to be for the wire-haired dachshund took first place in this group! That’s right, the squatty little professor of English Lit-ra-chur looking beast won.   Harumph. Then came the Toy Group which was my chance to...

Dog jammies – check. Dog socks – check. Dog cookie cutters – check (well, 2 of them). Bone Silly Bandz – check.  from the WKC website : Broadcast Information   The Hound, Toy, Non-Sporting, and Herding group competition will be televised live Monday on  USA Network from 8-9 PM ET and continuing on  CNBC  from 9-11 PM ET. The Sporting, Working, Terrier, and Best In Show competition will be televised live Tuesday on  USA Network  from 8-11 PM ET.  Breed judging highlight videos are available throughout the day on Monday and Tuesday on the Westminster Web site. These highlights will be available after the show, as well.  To our West Coast viewers:  Please note that the West Coast telecast is delayed for your time zone. Since results are posted to our Web site as they occur live, if you want to enjoy the drama of the moment, please avoid the Westminster Web site after 5 p.m. Pacific Time on each evening.  Wherever you are ove...

Just when you thought you might have a handle on identifying the various spitzes (#3) , they go and add another one or two to the mix. I think the foxy collar of the Norwegian Lundehund is distinctive enough to stand apart from the other spitzes - especially in the non-sporting group - but the impressive array of acceptable colors and markings of the Finnish Lapphund just confuses the issue further for me.  A medium height dog, the Lapphund can be black, blonde, brown, tan, cream, wolf sable, blue, brindle, and saddle! With that standard spitz smile, triangular ears, and curled-up tail, how is one to distinguish them from the other spitz types? Surprisingly NOT a Samoyed ! (Wikipedia commons) It appears, that except for the all cream color  (looks like a Samoyed to me), the Lapphund is likely to have some amazing facial markings.  Check out the spectacles and eyebrows on these beauties: Cool spectacles! (Wikipedia commons) Spectacles and Eyebrows! (Wikipedi...

Were you a kid going to the dentists anytime in the 60s, 70s or 80s? I don't know what the connection is, but it seems that dentist's waiting rooms during that time were lousy with Highlights magazines. If you were lucky enough to be one of those kids whose regular oral hygiene checks included a significant stay in a magazine filled room then Goofus and Gallant may just be among your early memories of behavior models.  Pronounced Ga-LAHNT, because GAL-ent never occurred to me, the well-behaved twin modeled perfect behavior while Goofus - let's just say, did not. But creator, Dr. Gary Cleveland Myers, was not the first to use pictures of boys with contrasting behaviors to highlight good behavior. An earlier instance can be found in the work of Utigawa Kuniyoshi , a Master of ukiyo-e , who created the Moral Guidelines for Good and Naughty Apprentices  in the mid 1800s. This shows a good apprentice doing his master's errands, while the bad apprentices are harassin...

I'm talking about this dog's inspiration to move its body. I'm a sucker for that hard physical workout montage accompanied by the urging, peppy music and ending triumphantly with a new, stronger body (cue Mr. Incredible). The game inspired me to eat cookies and be disappointed. :(  I'm going to have to roll that ball down the stairs a few extra times this week. Now, where to find that perfectly compelling, but upbeat music . . .

That's right, friends and dog lovers! The anticipated number of viewers of Superbowl XLVI to number of viewers for the PuppyBowl  VIII is 110 million to 10 million. I hadn't realized that the underdog's popularity was even that high! What's the PuppyBowl you ask? If you have more interest in flyball than football, are still bitter about your team's loss, or just don't want to look at Madonna, tune in to Animal Planet's Puppy Bowl .  If, during the game, your still find yourself wondering, What exactly is that PuppyBowl? you should, as my friend Amy urged me in 2009, " Go turn on Animal Planet right now and find out! " This year promises to be bigger and better!

(WKC photo) Now that you’ve read the title, you will never be at a loss for syllables when identifying this unique dog. The Xoloitzcuintli (actually pronounced “show-low-eats-queen-tley” - gesundheit) is the national dog of Mexico – and has no hair! In fact, you may have heard of it as the Mexican Hairless, but someone decided that name didn’t have enough gravitas, so Show-Low it became. Maybe the pup’s PR manager had the right idea, because after more than 3000 years of showing evil spirits the door, the Xolo is now showing its stuff at Westminster this year (more than 50 years after being dropped by the AKC for rarity and perceived extinction ). "I love your eyebrows. We'll call them Frida and Kahlo" Name the movie. Xolos remain relatively unchanged from the naturally selected state of its ancient breed native to Central America. In addition to its likeness found on 2-3000 year-old  pottery  and its carcass served on Aztec banquet tables, the Xolo was widel...

( WKC photo ) The first of the six breeds of dogs showing for the first time at Westminster this year is the Norwegian Lundehund. This smiling spitz dog has a fascinatingly specific breed history.  Its job: hunt puffins. ( Wikipedia commons photo ) As puffins ( lundefugl in Norwegian) are an endangered (and adorable) bird and are mostly protected throughout its range, the Lundehund is sadly out of work. Happily, its striking six toes used to help grip the treacherous coastal rocks where the puffins live and impressive contortionist abilities  used to get in and out of puffin caves are sure to be an asset to any new position.  If you think those skills might be transferable to any job you might have for one of these upbeat but down-on-his-luck pooches, contact the Norwegian Lunderhund Rescue here . (Also, if you live in Iceland or the Faroe Islands , the dog can still work in its original field.) Like many rare breeds, the Norwegian Lundehund was saved by a fe...

It's February. You know what that means, don't you? Yes, the Westminster Kennel Club Dog Show is only days away! (Twelve days to be precise). This year we'll be watching the show at home as usual. While this means we'll have cozy ring-side seats, lots of doggie-themed snacks, and the ability to yell comments and criticisms at the screen without interfering with our neighbors enjoyment of the event, it also means no benching area tours, no close-up and personal introductions to the dogs, and no trip to NYC (insert pouty look here). Nonetheless, in the upcoming days I'd like to introduce the breeds showing for the first time at Westminster, share some dog art, explore the long and intertwined man-dog relationship (including dog as fashion accessory), and showcase some silly and/or fascinating dog fun. In the meantime, in case you missed it, you can enjoy this latest episode of Castle , "An Embarrassment of Bitches."

How does one train a dog to show its teeth against the glass or blow air bubbles out of its nose? This certainly does look like one happy dog (except when the other dog is taking it for a walk). (via The Bark )

“It’s nice to share a religious experience with my pets,’’ said Lynda Juppe, who lives in Tewksbury. “‘God’ is ‘dog’ spelled backwards. Here, you know you’re with dog people, and you can’t go wrong with dog people.’’ From Paws and Worship , Boston Globe 30 May 2001 Apart from a saucy quip by Sr. Mary Bernadette and the simple comfort that one gains in having a pet, the article reveals a sort of unholy intersection of values which are in stark contrast to mine: first, that one’s life is at the mercy of God, and second, that animals have cognitive powers that equal one’s own (this may very well be the case in a few rare instances, but to assume this of others is just bad manners). If you are not attempting to enslave me, kill my dog, or anyone else in the name of that which you worship, then I really don’t care what you value beyond human life, be it deity or dog. I don’t discount the power of either of these values in the lives of those who adopt them, merely, that there is no logi...

Check out the  Border Wars post on these three dwarf genetic disorders and the breed standards that demand them. It's really interesting. As much as I find my Izzy a delightful little photogenic and lovable beast, next time, it's a real, full-size dog for me.